“I Don’t Want to Hurt Your Feelings…” – Beyond History
Note: Direct quotes from the original article are italicized.
“You know, some stories are better left untold…[but this one is not one of those]”
I am a white, male, college student that has spent over 15 years of my life in pursuit of education. Yet there are things I will never understand, never forget, and never have time to learn. There are people in this world who have had to endure atrocities that are unlike anything that should be possible in today’s society. Therefore, when I was asked to update this piece, I couldn’t help but feel like the original author. I am someone who should not be writing about things I do not know.
This piece is one that cannot be changed. Time will not change this story, nor should I.
Once, a woman was sitting at a table in an academic institution discussing with women in a Black Women’s literacy program in Chicago. As a Doctor of Adult Literacy, she looked for opportunities to address social and political literacy and discuss the difficulty of civilized discourse with people of different backgrounds. The students of the Chicago literacy program came from public housing and were of the African American “race”. One of the group’s mentors had started a weekly session entitled Women Empowerment Hour in which Black women were encouraged to talk about their issues, not only literacy issues but issues in their everyday lives. So, the woman took this opportunity to inform the women present at this particular Women Empowerment Hour that her ancestors were slave traders.
In 1994, the woman’s journey began as an associate professor in a Women’s Studies course for the Chicago literacy program. Her doctorate encouraged her to discover some of the negative aspects of education and some theoretical issues regarding the liberation of oppressed groups. She proposed a curriculum for the Women’s Studies course to educate students on the “culture of power” and the items necessary for American society. While implementing the educative materials, she met with an associate to share notes on the class and reflect on tensions between the class and the material presented therein. As she developed her curriculum, she ensured that there was an Afrocentric plan that was innately women-centered and taught the “language of power”. She focused on books that had themes revolving around male-female clashes, “race” clashes, and clashes between women.
As the woman designed her class from 1994 to 1996, she had a collection of notes from an associate professor that she always started with, “I don’t want to hurt your feelings….” During the development of her class, the associate professor continued to write her entries and encouraged the woman to abandon her distance from the situation and consider the conflicts that were arising as part of the growth of the professor, as well as the students. The woman states that her associate’s journal entries brought up mixed emotions within her as she realized she was neutralizing the content of the course and avoiding her own relationship with the conflicts that she was encouraging the students to discuss.
In the weeks before a new semester, she took all of the notes from the past semester and created a new section for her students to mull and grow. They had conceived certain notions of her as a professor, but they never could have imagined the new conflicts they would encounter in the upcoming semester. Names. That was the theme of not only one class but a whole content section. The professor encouraged her student to consider “why do popular names become popular” and “why is your name something that relates to your ‘race’?” A student visiting on this particular day was part of a family of slave traders that had once been part of the professor’s ancestral line. She reflects on this situation and considered delaying the confrontation of her relationship with this guest student one of her biggest missteps while developing the class.
In 1994, the class ended and the woman with the doctorate started her true mission. She spoke at two professional conferences, incorporated her experience into journals, and dished out as many spontaneous and riveting lectures as possible. She states that her understanding of this experience is that revelations of ancestry were not an expression of guilt; rather, revelations of ancestry can be expressions of joy and truth. The woman believes that it is beneficial to create a space for honest and open dialogue regarding differences and similarities regarding race, social class, and gender identities. Literacy can be a powerful liberatory tool when people strive to overcome societal norms. “We cannot be separated from our past, nor should we try to be…How do I reap every day what my ancestors sowed?”
I hope you just read that whole synopsis, considered what I could not touch on in two pages, and decided to read the article for yourself. Doctor Kate Shepherd Power is not only one of the most influential women for the Chicago Black Women’s literacy program, but she should be someone professors strive to mimic. “I don’t want to hurt your feelings but” in order for us to grow as a society, we must acknowledge that “race” is something that we are born with because of societal pressures. “I don’t want to hurt your feelings but” in order for us to grow as a society, we need to push aside “race” and pull self-reflection and interpersonal growth to the forefront.
“I feel uncomfortable because I believe white women do not like black women.”
Original Article: Beyond History (I don’t want to hurt you) Winter 1996